Silly Quotes

 

“Don’t criticize my mess unless you’d like to become part of it.”

 

“I have a mind like a steel trap; it is rusty and illegal in 47 states”

 

“A good essay is 10% inspiration, 15% perspiration, and 75% desperation”

 

“It is not MY fault that I never learned to accept responsibility”!

 

I’m an angel, honest! The horns are just there to keep the halo straight

 

If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie!!

 

“There’s nothing wrong with being a loser, it just depends on how good you are at it.”

 

If at first you don’t succeed, cheat, repeat until caught, and then lie!

 

Thank-you for visiting reality, come again……….. Now entering your life, welcome

 

The entire world’s a stage; I didn’t get cast!

 

Consciousness- that annoying time between naps

 

Suburbia – where they cut down trees and name streets after them

 

“Behind every good man there is a good woman and behind that another man looking at her ass”

 

I love him, O yes I do,

He’s for me, not for you,

And if by chance you take my place,

I’ll take my fist and smash your face!

 

“God made mud, God made dirt, God made guys so girls could flirt!”

 

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons!

 

For you are crunchy

And taste good with ketchup

 

Guys are like lava lamps there fun to look at just not so bright!

 

“Loves a two-way street and I think your car just died”

 

Guys are like lava lamps there fun to look at just not so bright!

 

“Loves a two-way street and I think your car just died”

 

Guys are like lava lamps there fun to look at just not so bright!

 

It takes 42 muscels to smile, so instead pick up your middle finger and

say bite me in a bitchy tone!

 

Every morning is the dawn of a new error

 

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder

 

Sign on baby’s bib: SPIT HAPPENS

 

I can see clearly now, the brain is gone…

 

Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay

 

Look out for #1. Don’t step in #2 either

 

Copywight 1994 Elmer Fudd. All wights wesewved

 

Dain bramaged

 

Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster

 

Access denied–nah nah na nah nah!

 

Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny

 

Beware of programmers who carry screwdriver

 

OUT TO LUNCH: IF NOT BACK BY FIVE, OUT FOR DINNER ALSO

 

A repair shop:

WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR – THE BELL DOESN’T WORK)

 

A Laundromat:

PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHING WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT